The small furry creature laying on the floor was not a Yorkipoo, but remnants of my hair. I shed about three more creature equivalents and my old life. My hair pays the price for major life changes such as birth and now death. It is hot where I live so I mainly put it up in a messy bun most days. What's the point of having something glorious if you do not use it to the utmost of its potential. It was time for my hair to reflect the massive upheaval of my life. Today, I let go of my hair symbollically letting go of what no longer serves me. I keep saying everything is an energy game. Releasing the old makes room for new growth. What are some things you should cut from your life?
Perhaps this change also represents my futile efforts to pare down my life. Sometimes it appears that the more things I release, the more things come my way. I have so many new projects that I am trying to work on at the same time and I feel like I am doing a piss poor job on all of them. Berating myself is definitely something I am cutting from my life. I accomplished quite a bit this week. I tried a pilot of my new "Energy Art with Stacy" offering and also have a draft of a pop up class. I am going to remember to celebrate what I am getting done instead of all the other things I want to do. Many of my friends have had to slow down to go fast this week. Perhaps that is the universe modeling what I need to do next. The more I try to force something to happen, the more obstacles are thrown my way. As I cut my hair, it is a gesture of surrender to allow something new.
In sculpture, you remove the clay until the object waiting inside reveals itself. As I start to cut away the parts that are not me, but who I think I should be, my true self comes into being. I must admit, I am terrified to walk in my power, but until I recognize that I am enough and worthy right now, I undermine myself. I am already the person I am supposed to be, I just need to believe it and continue to shed the layers of who I am not. Do you know who you are? Are you willing to bring your whole self to your life? I am not for everyone, nor do I have to be. I need to don the mental labcoat and clipboard of authority. I belong. If the box is too small, do not contort and shrink to fit it. Stretch your wings and break out of the box.
I am alone in a different way now. We are born alone and we die alone because no one can fully live our experience. Even if you were to be sitting next to me, you would not know "me". I wonder if that is also a story that I tell myself. It is very evident that I enjoy people and need to make meaningful connections. I have been gifted with reconnecting with many loved ones and new opportunities. This week I have done many things I would not normally do and have been gifted with rainbows, fellowship, and a sense of accomplishment. My mother always said that many hands lighten the load. Even though we are alone, we are all in this together. Have you been using the current situation to hide away? Perhaps you gave your life a buzz cut when you only needed a minor trim? Cut away your old beliefs and stories. How will your new life fall? Will you be wash and go or need to spend time effort to recreate the look?
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