"Mom, I don't know about my book." My eleven year old wants to be an author. I responded, "Just write about what you know." His despondent retort was that no one cares what he has to say. Have you felt like that? Why bother? Tons of other people have already done (insert dream or project) so they won't want mine. I told him to pick a card and he did not like the one he got. I asked him his thoughts and he said that he did not want to meditate like me. He chose another and got The Hermit and every subsequent card was about reflection or our inner critic. We give that inner critic so much power over us. If we think we will fail, we are more likely to make failure a self-fulfilling prophecy. Sit with those thoughts.
But, Stacy, I hate being in my feelings. My son, said the same thing. "I hate discomfort. No one likes discomfort." I agreed with him, and told him that discomfort is where the growth happens. If we confront those feelings of failure, or not being enough, and listen to what they are trying to tell us, what could happen? I asked him, what he thought the feelings were telling him and he said that maybe he should tweak his story to make it more interesting. What is your discomfort trying to tell you?
Embrace the suck was a popular adage a few years ago, but it's one of my personal mantras. Surrender to the process. Stop fighting the discomfort. Usually when we rip off the emotional bandage and allow the infection to come to the surface, we can begin to heal and make progress towards our dreams and goals. When you are knocked down, it does not mean you are out, just that you have a new vantage point. Take advantage of the view from the ground and remember it when you ascend to the heights.
Don't give up! Usually when I feel I am going to break, if I surrender, I bend instead. If my son quits before he finishes his book, he will never know his potential or lack thereof. Even if it turns out not to be a good book, he will gain the accomplishment of completing a grand task and take away the lessons of discipline and perserverance. We do not always see the growth that is happening because it is often under the surface. We walk away before the harvest and leave someone else to pick and enjoy the fruits of our labor. Are you going to give away your victory? Namaste.
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