No longer will I shove my nose in the proverbial poop. Shame is not a productive emotion. Not one, not three, but four women I admire greatly told me to rest. If you read last week's blog, you know I did not listen, but I did hear them. I have been working single-mindedly on a project, actually several projects. Today I completed the most tedious one and a painting. Everything in my life tells me to rest, nurture myself, and create. My eleven-year-old chastised me for not doing any free flow paintings. Everything has been mission-oriented, but I think I have forgotten my goal.
Despite the amount of energy expended, the boat kept filling with water. I was drowning and swimming against the tide. I let my career consume me this week. I have said it before, and I will repeat it; everything is an energy game. Energy is finite and, when wasted, is ineffective. I was working very hard this week and getting nowhere. When I did rest, I was able to gain a fresh perspective and able to salvage some of my projects.
It was five women sounding the drums. The fifth reminded me about grounding myself. My reptile brain howled in protest at going for a walk. "No!" it screamed, "we need to be working. We need to do spreadsheets, and we need to wow, look at that star! Petting our cat is relaxing." When I nurture myself, growth happens. Like my herb garden, I must ensure I have water and sunlight.
I am a user, and my drug of choice is "responsibility." "I must, or I should, I need to, just this last task," are common excuses of workaholics. When I tell myself the truth, I know those are all excuses. People love a giver. Setting priorities and boundaries to enforce them are the only cure. Where can I put my energy to produce the best outcomes for me? Where do you spend your energy? Who benefits? One of my favorite tools at work is Stop, Start, Continue. I am going to stop being a victim. Need to understand the other two? Feel free to reach out.
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