Who are you? If you had no title, or career, or ties, who would you be? So many times, we try and run away from ourselves. We either deny the body or push it to its limits. Dressed in our disguises, we try and stick to the script instead of adlibbing. Are you faithful to your authentic self, or do you war with yourself? Is it so awful to be you? When you strip everything else away, are we not human? We breathe the same air and move under the same sky. We love to create distinctions, but at the end of the day, we put on our clothes one leg at a time. If you cut us, we bleed. Most of our struggles come from denying who we are. We try to change others to feel better about ourselves. We do things we do not want to know to keep the peace. Marcus Aurelius said, "A man's life is what his thoughts make of it."
But, and there is always a but – I have to play the game. Eleanor Roosevelt said that "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent." When you listen to the voice inside your head, are you tearing yourself down or building yourself up? If someone says something about you that bothers you, ask yourself why it bothers you? Is it you or someone's incomplete interpretation of you? I find that the only things that bother me are things that someone says that I believe about myself. When I reflect on the past, so many things I thought about myself were not real. Is your inner dialogue helping or hurting you? Ask yourself what will be accomplished by those thoughts? If I keep telling myself, I am a failure or a loser, how will this help me to be a success?
Have you grown today or are you stuck in the same rut? When I was younger, I was not very good at math. I had to have tutoring not to fail math in the fifth grade. I liked math, but it did not like me. It was not until I discovered Calculus that it all made sense. It is similar to hating steamed vegetables and then learning to love them sautéed. If we keep trying to do things the way everyone else does it, instead of our way, we will continue to be fish trying to climb a wall. Salmon do swim upstream, but they have to jump. Are you ready to jump? It will not be easy, but if you challenge yourself, you will grow. I took the same session four times because I knew that it was a challenge. This past time, I finally felt like I knew what I was doing and was able to help others. Do not give up on yourself.
What are the assumptions you have about your life? Are they true? Have you tested the veracity of your belief? People thought I was hopeless in the kitchen. I cooked my first meal, and everyone raved about it. I thought it tasted horrible, but how could everyone be wrong? It was awful, but because everyone wanted to encourage me, they said it was good. The encouragement helped, and I have been able to make entire menus for special family occasions that are genuinely tasty. I learned from my mistakes and adapted. Thomas A. Edison said, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." What is not working for you? What will you try next?